Top 10 Things that Sound Dirty at Christmas

Did you get any under the tree?

I think your balls are hanging too low.

Check out Rudolph's Honker!

Santa's sack is really bulging.

Lift up the skirt so I can get a clean breath.

Did you get a piece of the fruitcake?

I love licking the end till it's really sharp and pointy.

From here you can't tell if they're artificial or real.

Can I interest you in some dark meat?

To get it to stand up straight, try propping it against the wall.