The Fairer Sex

The headmistress of a girls' boarding school was abruptly awakened one night by one of her students.

"Miz Forbes, Miz Forbes," she cried, "I've done a very foolish thing and let my boyfriend 'go all the way'."

"Now be calm, Melissa," the headmistress told her firmly. "The first thing you must do is go to the kitchen and eat a half a lemon."

"Half a lemon?" asked the surprised student. "And that will keep me from getting pregnant?"

"Actually no, dear," admitted the headmistress, "but at least it will get rid of that silly grin."