In The News ...

Seeing the Sights: A researcher reports that visitors to New York City are 34% more likely to have heart attacks than visitors to other cities. "And more than half of those heart attacks came during New York cab rides." (Mark Wheeler)

On the Campaign Trail: Elizabeth Dole said at a rally that she is not a career politician and as a result she does not have a lot of old political baggage. "Unless, of course, you count Bob Dole." (Quinn)

You May Already Be a Winner: The Senate is investigating deceptive sweepstakes practices. "These companies target the elderly, make them think they are going to get a bunch of money but in reality they never see any of it. The most popular of these scams is called Social Security." (Quinn)

Happy Birthday: Dennis the Menace is 49. "What do you get for a kid who's gotten away with everything?" (Voldseth)

Surfs Up: Billionaire Steve Forbes announced his candidacy for the presidency in 2000. This is interesting, he says he's going to campaign almost entirely on the Internet. The bad news: The polls say if the election were held today, he'd lose to Pamela Anderson. (Steve Voldseth)

Off the Field: The FBI cleared UCLA football players in a probe of possible point shaving. "In a little-noticed aspect of the case, the FBI also cleared the Los Angeles Clippers of point shaving after the Feds determined the Clippers just plain stink." (Mark Wheeler)

Shhh, It's a Secret: The Clinton administration is embroiled in allegations that China stole nuclear secrets. "Last year at this time, the only problem Clinton had with China was Hillary throwin' it at him." (Jay Leno)

That Old Black Magic: Clinton's Agency for International Development gave money to a group that sometimes spreads its family planning message at voodoo rituals. "Clinton's actually into voodoo. In fact, he named a zombie vice president." (Daily Scoop)

You've Got Male: Hillary Rodham Clinton went on America Online to discuss White House pets. "Mainly Socks and Buddy, not the two-legged dog who lives with her." (Ira Lawson)

Rocky Times: The Rock and Rolle Hall of Fame induction ceremony was held this week at the Waldorf-Astoria in New York. "That's where many of the aging rockers spent the night. But the closest they came to trashing their rooms was accidentally ripping the safety bar out of the wall after slipping in the tub." (Jon Stewart)

On the Campaign Trail: Steve Forbes became the first presidential candidate ever to announce his candidacy on the Internet. "Which means that, at some point, he'll also be the first person to withdraw from the race on the Internet." (Ira Lawson)