School Daze

I remember once in elementary school, I was home sick for over a week. My teacher sent my mother a "thank-you" note.

- - - - -

The teacher was surprised to get a note from a mother the very first day of school, since her child was present. All it said was: "Please excuse Paul for being. It was his father's fault."

- - - - -

Lil' Bradley came home complaining after his first day of school. "I'm not going back tomorrow. I can't read yet. I can't write yet either, and the teacher won't let me talk."

- - - - -

The teacher was instructing her students on how she expected them to behave. "If you have to go to the bathroom, please raise two fingers." She demonstrated, holding her arm straight up.

From the back of the room came a tiny voice: "I don't see how that's going to help anything."