In The News...

He (Don Ohlmeyer) thinks I'm funny in those (SNL sketches), but I stink in those. He doesn't think I'm funny in 'Weekend Update.' God only knows, it's just a matter of opinion. He also thinks O.J. is innocent. -- Norm Macdonald telling David Letterman why he was fired as anchor of 'Weekend Update' on SNL

Demerit Badge: The California Supreme Court is hearing arguments over whether the Boy Scouts violated any laws by denying membership to gays. "It seems to me that any group that walks around in scarves and little shorts should not criticize somebody else's life."(Jay Leno)

Negative Image: There's controversy over a vacation photo that was printed of President Clinton and his wife, Hillary, dancing in their swimsuits. "Some people think it violates the first family's right to privacy; others think it violates the public's right to never see the president and Hillary in bathing suits." (Conan O'Brien)

Journalism 101: After a televised barking and hissing match between Buddy the dog and Socks the cat, CNN brought on an animal behavior expert to comment on what happened. "Hello! One's a dog and one's a cat. Do we really need an expert?" (Leno)