Beer

You can't be a real country unless you have a beer and an airline -- it helps if you have some kind of a football team, or some nuclear weapons, but at the very least you need a beer. -- Frank Zappa

Always do sober what you said you'd do drunk. That will teach you to keep your mouth shut. -- Ernest Hemmingway

Time is never wasted when you're wasted all the time. -- Catherine Zandonella

If God had intended us to drink beer, He would have given us stomachs. -- David Daye

Work is the curse of the drinking class. -- Oscar Wilde

Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy. -- Benjamin Franklin

If you ever reach total enlightenment while drinking beer, I bet it makes beer shoot out your nose. -- Deep Thought, Jack Handy

Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is beer. Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a fine invention, but the wheel does not go nearly as well with pizza. -- Dave Barry

People who drink light "beer" don't like the taste of beer; they just like to pee alot. -- Capital Brewery, Middleton, WI

Not all chemicals are bad. Without chemicals such as hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer. -- Dave Barry