Scottish Old Timer

THE SETTING:

A Scottish old timer in Scotland, in a bar, talking to a young man.

Old Man: "Lad, look out there to the field. Do ya see that fence? Look how well it's built. I built that fence stone by stone with me own two hands. Piled it for months. But do they call me McGregor-the-fence- Builder? Noooo..."

Then the old man gestured at the bar.

"Look here at the bar. Do ya see how smooth and just it is? I planed that surface down by me own achin' back. I carved that wood with me own hard labour, for eight days. But do they call me McGregor-the-Bar -Builder? Nooo..."

Then the old man points out the window.

"Eh, Laddy, look out to the sea. Do ya see that pier that stretches out as far as the eye can see? I built that pier with the sweat off me own back. I nailed it board by board. But do they call me McGregor- the -Pier -Builder? Nooo..."

Then the olf man looks around nervously, trying to make sure no one is paying attention. . .

"But ya fuck one goat..."