LowComDom Performances Presents
Real Quaker Talk
There was a clerk in a small town general store in the South. One day, a tall man entered the store and began filling a shopping cart with items.
This man was so distinctive in that he could have been the official spokesperson for Quaker Oats. He was dressed in black, very tall, and had that hat just like the Quaker Oats guy wears.
Well, the clerk had never seen a Quaker before, let alone talked to one. When the man reached the counter with his selections, the clerk could hardly contain himself. "Are you a Quaker?" he asked as he was trying to ring up the merchandise.
"Yes," the tall man said with a little edge in his voice.
"No joke?" asked the clerk. "You're really a real Quaker?"
The man, looking a little more perturbed, said, "Yes, I am a real Quaker."
"Wow!" the young clerk said. "I never seen a real Quaker before. Would you say something in Quaker talk for me?"
The tall man ignored this request and waited for his merchandise to be tallied up.
As the clerk finished ringing up the sale, he said, "Please, mister, say something in Quaker talk?"
The man finally leaned over the counter in a gesture of secrecy. The clerk leaned forward in order to hear the quiet reply.
The man said, "Screw Thee Asshole."