LowComDom Performances Presents
Best of Hollywood Squares
Peter Marshall's favorite answers from Hollywood Squares:
According to Movie Life magazine, Ann-Margaret would like to start having babies soon, but her husband wants her to wait awhile. Why? Paul Lynde: He's out of town.
Dennis Weaver, Debbie Reynolds, and Shelley Winters star in the movie, "What's The Matter With Helen?" Who plays Helen? Charley Weaver: Dennis Weaver-that's why they asked the question.
What are "dual-purpose cattle" good for that other cattle aren't? Paul Lynde: They give milk ... and cookies, but I don't recommend the cookies.
Who stays pregnant for a longer period of time, your wife or your elephant? Paul Lynde: Who told you about my elephant?
When a couple have a baby, who is responsible for its sex? Charley Weaver: I'll lend him the car. The rest is up to him.
Robert Young recently stated, "I never, never give ..." something to his fans who ask for it. What? Paul Lynde: A hysterectomy.
James Stewart did it over twenty years ago when he was forty-one years old. Now he says it was "one of the best things I ever did. What was it? Marty Allen: Rhonda Fleming.
Jackie Gleason recently revealed that he firmly believes in them and has actually seen them on at least two occasions. What are they? Charley Weaver: His feet.
Before a cow will give you any milk, she has to have something very important. What? Paul Lynde: An engagement ring.
According to Robert Mitchum, one thing has ruined more actors than drinking. What? Charley Weaver: Not drinking.
When the Lone Ranger finished with a case, he left something behind. What? Paul Lynde: A masked baby.
True or false: Some African Watusi tribesmen greet guests by running toward them at full speed, then high-jumping over them. Charley Weaver: This is sometimes terribly embarrassing to tall guests.
You're on your first visit to Japan, and you head right for the Kabuki. Why? Paul Lynde: It was a long plane ride.
If you're going to make a parachute jump, you should be at least how high? Charley Weaver: Three days of steady drinking should do it.
Do female frogs croak? Paul Lynde: If you hold their little heads under water.
You've been having trouble going to sleep. Are you probably a man or a woman? Don Knotts: That's what's been keeping me awake.
Is there any such thing as an F cup in bra sizes? Paul Lynde: Yes, it sleeps four.
True or false: Many people sleep better in their street clothes than they do in their pajamas. Paul Lynde: Yes. We call them winos.
According to the World Book, is it okay to freeze your persimmons? Paul Lynde: No. You should dress warmly.
According to psychologists, when a child begins to get curious about sex, what is the one question he will most ask his mommy and daddy? Paul Lynde: Where can I get some?
Your baby has a certain object which he loves to cling to. Should you try to break him of his habit? Joan Rivers: Yes. It's daddy's turn.