LowComDom Performances Presents
MAYNARD, MA. Digital Equipment Corporation (DEC) today announced that it has signed a letter of intent to sell all of the vowels in its corporate name. The deal would sell the vowels to a yet unnamed buyer. If the deal goes through the company would be known as Dgtl.
The letter deal follows close on the heals of the sale of Alpha chip technology to Intel and the rumored sale of the networking equipment division to Cabletron.
Dgtl spokes person, Niki Richardson, said that the vowels were not part of the Dgtl's core business and long term strategy. "We feel that our core competencies lie more in the area of consonants," stated Richardson.
Further rumors stated that there was considerable discussion within the company over whether to replace the missing letters with blanks or apostrophes. Apparently it was decided to use neither as a further cost cutting measure. However, Dgtl official strongly denied that the company is attempting to raise enough cash to cover so called "golden parachutes" for its executives.
Long time Dgtl watcher, Terry Shannon, stated that, "This move can only make Dgtl a stronger company." Other industry analysts, particularly those whose entire livelihood does not depend on whether Dgtl exists, claim the move is of questionable value. James Morris, an analyst at International Data Corp in Framingham, Massachusetts says, "I don't think the deal makes any sense, I can't even pronounce Dgtl."
Dgtl expects to name the buyer within the next several weeks.
Dgtl stock remained unchanged after the news, as no one was quite sure whether the stock symbol was still DEC or had now become DC.