LowComDom Performances Presents
The Top 15 Other Things in the Hale-Bopp Comet's Tail
15> Gazillions of unmatched socks
14> Guy with rainbow-colored wig and sign that says, "John 3:16"
13> Replacement players for the Chicago Cubs
12> By contractual arrangement with Nike, it's now called the Hale-Bopp "Swoosh."
11> Castration debris
10> A "My Other Interstellar Vehicle Goes Faster Than Light" bumper sticker
9> A few stale cheese puffs, four Junior Mints, some loose change, and the remote control
8> Spacedust bunnies
7> William Shatner's hairpiece from episode #12 of the original Star Trek
6> A hitman from the planet Zircon with a contract on Pauly Shore
5> A smaller comet that's honking and trying to pass
4> Where there's tail, Wilt Chamberlain can't be far away
3> A bumper sticker which reads: "I Brake for Cult Members"
2> I'm sorry, I was watching Pamela Lee on Saturday Night Live. What was the question?
and the Number 1 Other Thing in the Hale-Bopp Comet's Tail...
1> Yet another Starbucks