LowComDom Performances Presents
I walked in my Vampires in Literature class today to take my final, and this is what I found on the board: "Rumour has it that this is a class where we teach students to be vampires. Because of this, we had to modify our grading scale:"
F-if you're one of those wimpy "symbolic vampires"
D-if you can turn into a bat
D- -if we can see the strings
D+ -if rats *like* you (sorry Raphrat and Rat Bastard)
C- -if you talk like any character in Nadja
C-if you can make neat shadow puppets without moving
C+ -if you have acquired super taxicab hailing powers
B- -if you can make dates spill wine on themselves just by thinking about it
B-if you can summon Cenobites with a Rubix Cube
B+ -if you can use mind control to make someone "off" Rush
A- -if you have hair like Nadja's Renfield (men only)
A-if you have a legion of sex slaves
A+ -if you bring them over to our house (note-if they're ugly, you get an F) +5 bonus points- if your wallet is the one that says "Phallic Mutha"
*sigh* gotta love academics... Whips and Kisses--- Twilight, who better get an A+ dammit, esp. after last night.... *wink*