Hard of Hearing

Two women run into each other outside an exclusive department store. The first woman is carrying lots of packages and it's clear she's been power shopping.

Woman One: "Sweetie, I don't know why we haven't seen you around the club lately. I ran into your doctor and he said he told you to diet and exercise."

Woman Two: "Really?! Well, bless your heart for telling me. I sure thought he said, "Buy it and accessorize!"