LowComDom Performances Presents
The Granite Humanoid
One day a planet is discovered out Antares way whose sole inhabitant is an enormous humanoid, three miles high and made of granite.
At first it is mistaken for an immense statue left by some vanished race of giant, for it squats motionless on a yellow plain, exhibiting no outward sign of life.
It has legs, but it never rises to walk on them.
It has a mouth, but never eats or speaks.
It has what appears to be a perfectly functional brain, the size of a condominium, but the organ lies dormant, electrochemical activity at a standstill.
Yet it lives.
This puzzles the scientists, who try everything they can think of to get some sign of life from the behemoth--in vain.
It just squats, motionless and seemingly thoughtless, until one day a xenobiologist, frustrated beyond endurance, screams, "How could evolution give legs, mouth and brain to a creature that doesn't use them?"
It happens that he's the first one to ask a direct question in the thing's presence.
It rises with a thunderous tumble to its full height, scattering the clouds, thinks for the second, booms, "IT COULDN'T," and squats down again.
"My god," exclaims the xenobiologist, "of course! It only stands to reason!"