Psychiatric Hotline
Hello. Welcome to the Psychiatric hot line.
If you are obsessive-compulsive, press 1 repeatedly.
If you are co-dependent, ask someone to press 2.
If you have multiple personalities press 3,4,5, and 6.
If you are paranoid-delusional, we know who you are and what you want, just stay on the line until we trace you.
If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a little voice will tell you which number to press.
If you are manic-depressive, it doesn't matter which number you press. No one will answer.
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