In The News...

Early and Often: Halloween is the time of year when everybody's attention turns to raising the dead--or as they call it in Chicago... getting out the vote. (Voldseth)

Dot.com Kinda Town: San Francisco city employees can now get a sex change on their medical insurance. The city did, however, say no to computer nerd type employees who also asked for sex change coverage -- from gettin' none to gettin' some! (Williams)

Bush Brains: President Bush's T-ball field is a huge success. He spends his non-working hours sitting in the stands. He really likes those matinee games. (Ray)

Doctor Safe: A daring rescue from Antarctica was going smoothly Wednesday night. A doctor with gallstones is being airlifted from the South Pole, for surgery in Denver. Wait a minute DENVER?!?! When will these health maintenance organizations loosen up their rules? (Richard Burkard/ http://www.LaughLine.com)

New Hire: CNN Headline News surprised some people Wednesday, by hiring Andrea Thompson as a news anchor. Yes, it's the same Andrea Thompson who appeared on "N-Y-P-D Blue" two years ago. Someone must have decided Chuck Roberts needs a love interest.... (Burkard)

Star Power: CNN executives say their networks need more "star power." But we thought CNN Headline News already had a star anchor in Lynne Russell. Then again, she's a part- time sheriff's deputy [True] -- so maybe Andrea Thompson was hired to be her beat partner. (What a great series this would be: "Anchor Cops! They get their man AND the top story!") (Burkard)

Downey and Out: "Ally McBeal" chief David E. Kelley looks to replace poor Robert with someone a little more reliable and a little less embarrassing. I think the choice is obvious. Two words: Darryl. Strawberry. (Ross Greenawalt KOTV)

Willbutin Works: Scientists say the anti-depression drug Willbutin increases the sex drive in women. Researchers don't know the long term effects. But experiments are sure going well now. (Alan Ray)

Jackass Hurts: Two kids were hurt trying to copy the stunts on MTV's "Jackass". Producers say this is not the message of the show. Rather, that young people should waste their time in a more productive manner. (Ray)